Homevillage Glory

I’ve been away from my hometown for almost two and a half years. Since grade 12 ended, I haven’t spent much time there aside from a few holidays and as a transition between somewhere (wherever that is) and the cottage. Adele sings about her hometown, London, on her album 19. I thought I would take that song and alter it a little bit to reflect my hometown.

I've been walking in the same way as I did
Missing out the cracks in the pavement bridge[1]
And tutting my heel and strutting my feet[2]
"Is there anything I can do for you dear? Is there anyone I could call[3]?"
"No and thank you, please Madam Lisa[4]. I ain't lost, just wandering ‘cause you can’t really get lost in Fenelon Falls."

Round my hometownvillage[5]
Memories are “Fresh Fruit and Vegetables”[6]
Round my hometownvillage
Ooh the people I've met
Are the wonders of my world generally very old
Are the wonders of my world probably (or have been) employed at the local Sobey’s
Are the wonders of this world likely to be tourists
Are the wonders of my world listening to country music

I like it in the city village when the air streets is are so thick and opaque unplowed
I love to see everybody in short skirts, shorts and shades Skidoo suits
I like it in the city village when two worlds collide Canadian Tire is having a sale
You get the people and the government more people[7]
Everybody taking different sides buying tractors

Shows that we ain't gonna stand let our shit[8] go to waste
Shows that we are united agriculturally sensitive
Shows that we ain't gonna take it let John Deere go out of business
Shows that we ain't gonna stand shit
Shows that we are united sitting and operating our heavy machinery

Round my hometownvillage
Memories are fresh shared[9]
Round my hometownvillage
Ooh the people I've met
(Do da di di da da da da do do do do oh oh oh yaaaaaa yaa aye) (medley of strumming guitar strings and church bells)[10]

Are the wonders jewels[11] of my world the Kawarthas
Are the wonders jewels of my world the Kawarthas
Are the wonders jewels of my world the Kawarthas
Are the wonders jewels of my world the Kawarthas

Of my  world
Yeah
Of my world
Of my world yeah

I tease

But home is home

Even if it is Fenelon Falls[12]

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[1] The iconic bridge over Fenelon Falls’ falls.

[2] This line is completely cut because no one in Fenelon would use those words.

[3] Not a change, but a clarification: literally call. Simply calling out into the open from one street will effectively reach one across town.

[4] Because 1 in 2 people in Fenelon Falls are named Lisa. Even the men.

[5] Fenelon Falls is, in fact, a village.

[6] The name of the stand that sells fresh fruit and vegetables where our bowling alley was burned down by an arsonist.

[7] Don’t worry, Fenelon Falls only has a population of 1,800 so “people and more people” isn’t actually a lot of people.

[8] manure

[9] We may be small, but we’re close.

[10] Fenelon Falls has 13 churches within a two-kilometre radius.

[11] Fenelon Falls is known as the “Jewel of the Kawarthas” (referring to the Kawartha Lakes)

[12] I just decided to make up that last part because I have butchered the song already but I also want to include that I really do love Fenelon even with its quirks and home IS home.