Mousehunt

One thing that I categorically cannot handle is the cockroach. And it just so happens that I just spotted a large cockroach, about three inches long, in my room. After a desperate attempt to kill it with a shoe, it skittered into an opening below a shelf which I have now blocked off, as pictured below.

I don’t think that it will be able to emerge from there anytime soon. At least not for the next five nights that I’m here. And I know, I know, where there’s one there’s bound to be others, but in the twenty-seven days I’ve been here that’s the first I have seen. So blah.

My adversity to cockroaches stems from daycare when I was probably four or five. We were watching the movie Mousehunt, and as you might remember, near the beginning this guy is in a restaurant with his family, eats his food, then starts to feel funny. Then he pukes up the pink liquid and dozens of cockroaches come out with it. Disgusting, right? Anyway, I distinctly remember being horrified at this and I think that’s why it got turned off. I’m sure it’s a funny movie.

But you can see how that would be scarring for a child, right? And I just carry that fear with me to this day. I remember my mom and dad telling me once that some apartments in Toronto have cockroaches in them, which I still don’t doubt, and I just remember thinking to myself, “I am so happy that I don’t have to deal with that.”

False. But I don’t think anyone likes the idea of a cockroach crawling on them in the middle of the night. Luckily I have a mosquito net that will probably keep anything out (I just have to do another thorough check of my bedsheets). Spiders and bugs and newts I can deal with, but not so much the cockroaches.

I know that this hasn’t been the most culturally-prevalent blog post, but I promise that I have something coming. I just don’t think it would be appropriate to post the other thing that’s on my mind with a cockroach post.

UPDATE (9:40pm) : OH SWEET GESUNDHEIT THERE’S ANOTHER.

UPDATE (9:46pm) : FORGIVE ME MOTHER NATURE.

UPDATE (9:47pm) : It’s dead. It was Devon in the hut with the shoe. I had to, I’m sorry. There’s a reason why people have cockroach baths on Fear Factor. Please hope that I make it through the night.

UPDATE (9:50pm) : I CAN HEAR THE ONE I TRAPPED TRYING TO OMG OMG IT’S FREE IT ESCAPED MY ALCATRAZ IT’S BIGGER THAN THE LAST SHIT SHIT SHIT OK I’M GOING OUTSIDE OF MY NET

UPDATE (10:09pm) : Number of cockroaches sighted: 4. Number of cockroaches dead: 3. One came to my window and then decided to leave. I also have a finger injury due to a particularly forceful shoe whack. Oh, and they have wings. You hear the flutter and you know one is somewhere. I am considerably stressed out now.

UPDATE (10:15pm) : Killed another. Going to turn out my lights and super tuck my mosquito net and check my sheets again and hope that no more come in. Good night.

UPDATE (6:32am) : I survived. Heard flutters of them when I turned my lights out. I'm officially scarred for life.

They're ugly-looking things.