I once attended a table etiquette lesson (context omitted). I believed the session was titled “Etiquette Lesson.” I think that this was misleadingly named because in no way does it apply to Afghan table etiquette norms. There is a clear dichotomy between that which I was taught and what is accepted as polite amongst actors from Kabul.
There: Avoid a buffet at all costs.
Here: Dishes are always served on the table, at which point everyone takes their own portion.
There: Stick to your own food.
Here: Before you start eating, you offer food from your plate to your friends.
There: You touch the bread, you eat it.
Here: You throw pieces of Indian bread across the table to each other upon notice of lack of Indian bread on your plate.
There: Tea and coffee is always the last thing served.
Here: Tea and coffee before the meal, during, at the end, and after.
There: Cutlery.
Here: Fingers. Even thumbs sometimes.
There: It is better to be hungry than to embarrass yourself at the table.
Here: It’s food. Eat. Yes, even if you have to reach across someone’s plate. No one will care.
Yes, maybe the “theres” are appropriate for a formal Canadian dinner, and I think therein lies the problem. This lesson was completely negligent of other cultures, and therefore should have been titled “An Etiquette Lesson for a Formal Canadian Dinner.” Otherwise, opposite the aforementioned example, it’s a little rude in my opinion. Something to be aware of the next time you are planning your next etiquette lesson. “Be specific, Bob!” (The Incredibles? Anyone?)
Also, here at the native dance retreat village (named Nrityagram), it is advised to “use a [flashlight] at night and use footwear outside your living space” because “you may come across snakes and scorpions.” However, “they will not harm you unless you go near or provoke them.” Torchless one night, I stepped on cockroaches, sparking the thought of their exclusion from the safety tips.
Thirty seconds later on that same torchless evening, I would also come to question the exclusion of tennis-ball sized toads.
There: Avoid a buffet at all costs.
Here: Dishes are always served on the table, at which point everyone takes their own portion.
There: Stick to your own food.
Here: Before you start eating, you offer food from your plate to your friends.
There: You touch the bread, you eat it.
Here: You throw pieces of Indian bread across the table to each other upon notice of lack of Indian bread on your plate.
There: Tea and coffee is always the last thing served.
Here: Tea and coffee before the meal, during, at the end, and after.
There: Cutlery.
Here: Fingers. Even thumbs sometimes.
There: It is better to be hungry than to embarrass yourself at the table.
Here: It’s food. Eat. Yes, even if you have to reach across someone’s plate. No one will care.
Yes, maybe the “theres” are appropriate for a formal Canadian dinner, and I think therein lies the problem. This lesson was completely negligent of other cultures, and therefore should have been titled “An Etiquette Lesson for a Formal Canadian Dinner.” Otherwise, opposite the aforementioned example, it’s a little rude in my opinion. Something to be aware of the next time you are planning your next etiquette lesson. “Be specific, Bob!” (The Incredibles? Anyone?)
Also, here at the native dance retreat village (named Nrityagram), it is advised to “use a [flashlight] at night and use footwear outside your living space” because “you may come across snakes and scorpions.” However, “they will not harm you unless you go near or provoke them.” Torchless one night, I stepped on cockroaches, sparking the thought of their exclusion from the safety tips.
Thirty seconds later on that same torchless evening, I would also come to question the exclusion of tennis-ball sized toads.
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